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| Couples urged to avoid the cohabitation “trap” |
| Family |
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A study by University of Denver psychologist Dr. Scott Stanley has concluded that couples who start living together without first getting married can risk forgoing the chance to marry someone who would make a better life-partner, the Washington Post reported. Based on five years of research, Stanley found that of the 60 to 70 per cent of engaged couples who move in together, two-thirds find it simpler to stay in the relationship, even after they decide not to get married. The problem, in his view, is one of inertia. “Some people get trapped by that and they end up hanging around,” he said, even if they were to meet “a person who’s a better fit.” Some will slide even further into the relationship by having children. “Cohabitation may not be making some relationships more risky,” Stanley told the Washington Post. “What it may be doing is making some risky relationships more likely to continue.” Whether couples choose to cohabit with the expectation of getting married or as a way to avoid making a lifelong commitment, he added, they should “not assume that living together is such a harmless, easy thing to do that won’t affect your life.” An earlier study released by Stanley and others in February also suggested that cohabitation can be detrimental to marital satisfaction. Of 1,050 married couples surveyed, almost 19 per cent of couples who had moved in together before marriage had discussed divorce; only 10 per cent of those who had waited until marriage had contemplated divorce. In this country, the growth in common-law unions continues to outpace marriages. As Statistics Canada reported two years ago, there were 18.9 per cent more common-law-couple families in 2006 than there were just five years earlier. In contrast, the increase in the number of married-couple families was only 3.5 per cent over the same period. But contrary to popular perceptions, older Canadians contribute the largest increase in these percentages. Among those aged 60 to 64, the increase in common-law relationships rose 77 per cent between 2001 and 2006. And among all age groups over 50, the increase was between 44 and 64 per cent. |
