Written by Peter Jon Mitchell, a research analyst at the Institute of Marriage and Family Canada

Remember the TV show Kids Say the Darndest Things? A new survey of more than 4,500 Canadian youth reveals that teens say the darndest things, too. Except what they’re saying isn’t so much funny as surprising: 67 per cent of teens said family life is very important to them. A large majority of teens also reported finding significant enjoyment in their relationships with parents.

The survey, conducted by University of Lethbridge sociologist Reginald Bibby, suggests youth are bucking stereotypes by putting a growing value on family and home life. Along with this surprisingly positive view of family, more Canadian teens are abstaining from sex, drugs and alcohol.

The question is, How long will this virtuous trend last? Teen pregnancy is back on the rise in the United States after years of decline. In spite of sex education and the sex-obsessed media, surveys reveal that parental attitudes is the number one influence affecting teen decision making about sex – but parents need to step up to the plate.

Teens long for intimacy, love and acceptance. What is surprising is that despite high rates of divorce and family breakdown, Bibby’s survey shows teens still believe these longings can be fulfilled within the family. Canadian teens long to make family life work.

Canadian parents should be thrilled that behind the nonchalant façade, most teens really do crave and enjoy relationships with their folks. Engaging teens starts early, building attachments and bonds early in a child’s life. Nurturing relationships with teens not only takes time, but can sometimes be a challenge – especially when teens make poor choices. (For help with parenting teens, readers living in the Saskatoon, Calgary, Edmonton and Vancouver regions still have time to attend Turbulence Ahead – an evening with youth expert Mark Gregston, presented by Focus on the Family Canada.)

Teens are saying surprising things. They believe that family can still work. Despite appearances, they deeply desire meaningful relationships with their parents. Let’s hope parents are listening.